Adam Lehman: Porn in the Days of Dial Up – Funny Fruits

Adam Lehman: Porn in the Days of Dial Up - Funny Fruits



who you're single were my single people at maybe that's why you're so miserable I don't know I don't know my roommate she's single and she calls me up all the time and she's like I just matched like I can hear her soul die like bitch there's no need to be nervous around me all right as a gay man I've been on the internet for decades right I was there when commitment was a twenty eight eight internet connection and porn all right remember those days you see a picture you like you click on it and it's just like goodbye and you just like did somebody pick up the phone you know you fuck it took two hours I'm just gonna masturbate to that I that's what I'm gonna do I don't have time for that like I was so like the internet was there like like a commodity right like we couldn't deal with it like it was such a scarce commodity I remember I used to like print out my porn for later like I was on the Oregon Trail of dick right like what fuck was this and like I didn't want to use the white paper because that's what my mom bought right so I use like the multicolor tones right so it looked like my porn was thematic right it was like this guy's sad this guy's John Doe strange it's just really weird I always wonder too like there's so many ways to hook up like we have manhunt like dudes nude what do lesbians have is anybody like everything that's like the worst time for you to go because I was wondering is there like a cunt hunt sorry not everybody likes the word hunt I know I know I know and I did I tried to figure it out I can't hear you I tried to figure it out like I logged on to cont hon I got redirected to you Hall I was like that's fucked up like that's messed up what the fuck and I don't hate lesbians I do I love it thank you for coming out I love it I love that you're wearing your blazer and your fuck me Crocs good for you good for you fuck me Crocs are hard to come by and I love lesbians because listen gays if it wasn't for lesbians we would have zero rights alright so give it up for the lesbian it's fucking true and I took I used to work on the marriage campaigns in Maine in New Jersey it's why we lost the first time anyway we were there and I noticed that whenever we went to a March or a rally the lesbians had our back right because everybody's there and they're like chanting and they're saying shit the gay lesbians are very specific in what they want all right so lesbians are like what do we want marriage equality when do we want it all right and they're like ripping the heads off of tofu chickens like gays we're like we're fucked up but gays we're just like what do we want when do we want it all the fucking time you

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